Sunday, August 30, 2009

I'm sick and tired...

...of being in pain. I hurt so much. Every now and then I get sharp, shooting pains on my right side (the side with the abscess). When it's not sharp, shooting pains, it's like constant cramping. It's gotten so bad, I can't sleep on my tummy anymore. And no doctor wants to do anything for me. The original doctor who did my surgery to remove the abscess doesn't want to deal with me anymore because I was referred to another surgeon that my GP referred me to. My GP doesn't want to do anything because it's not in her "area of expertise". The other surgeon hasn't seen me since June and won't see me until October because she's on holidays. Fantastic. Meanwhile, I'm in pain and frustrated.

So, both Darren and I have some challenges (above and beyond the abscess issues above) coming up.
September 10, Darren gets to go make a "deposit" at the hospital. He's a lot less worried about it now after I asked some questions when I called to make the appointment. The poor man was imagining a curtained off area with assistance. read that right. We're talkin' "Road Trip" type images floating through his wild (more wild than I ever gave him credit for) imagination.
September 15 (yay, second year anniversary), I have my first appointment with the fertility specialist in town. I've read his reviews on NOT good. I'm a little terrified. Some of the reviews are obviously just from ladies who want to blame their infertility on someone. Others scare the bejeebies out of me. I'll go for the initial consultation, and if he is really as bad as some of the reviews say, I will go back to my GP (who made the referral) and talk to her about it. I know that I can't put 100% stock into those reviews. My own GP has a few not so great reviews, yet I love her. I'm willing to give this guy a chance.

I'm trying really hard to not make this blog a "poor me" blog. I know that I have a lot of things to be very thankful for. And I'm trying. I really am. Some days, like today, when I am in so much pain, it's hard. Darren has been fantastic, but he's a boy and he just doesn't get it. He's willing to go through the testing, which I know that I'm very fortunate for.

I am thankful for:
1. My husband - he is as supportive as he can be
2. My mom - she has been there and can understand the frustration
3. My mother-in-law - again, she has been there. She's been very supportive.
4. My friend - although we haven't had a chance to spend much time together since I moved jobs, I know that she would be there for her
5. My health - although there are some aspects of my body that are currently rebelling, however, overall, I am healthy

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